The Chaos Factor

I’m down in Oklahoma for a few days for my sister’s wedding and to visit my family. It’s hot and humid (heat index of 115 yesterday!) and I’m consistently lost even though I grew up here, but I’m having fun. Mostly. One thing I don’t like about being around my family is the chaos factor. Some of that is just because there’s just so darn many of us but most of it is simply severe FTP (Failure To Plan) syndrome, flavored generously with I Won’t Make a Decision and a sprig of I Refuse to Take Charge. Most of the time the offending family members are TRYING to be nice, not step on toes and such, or just not bother people, but when no one is doing what needs to be done, especially in a timely way, then things end up painfully messy. Most of the people in my family shrug and say ‘oh that’s just the way things are,’ but really they need to admit to themselves that Yes, You Are The Problem. And people continue to suffer. It’s really a shame, because my family is terribly nice and accommodating. At any rate, I’ve gone through a lot of years of therapy and I’m medicated now so it doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it used to, though when I’m here I often feel the urge to be The Responsible One (aka The Mean One) again. I still love my family and I don’t like watching them hurt themselves and others this way, but I can separate myself from it. Mostly.

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